spoon

My Colourful World - (Blog-a-ton 6)

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This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 6; the sixth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

***


1


Love stories have never fascinated me, neither in print nor on screen. For they are lame and boring, I despised them. Then again it doesn’t mean I can’t fall in love with a girl. And that’s what I did: I fell in love. But I didn’t know that the after effects could be so tiresome.

Now, sitting at my favourite table in my room, deep in thought, with a blank sheet of paper in front of me, I was lost, for a herculean task lay in front of me – a task of writing a love letter to my love.

I had never written one in the past; in fact, I had never felt the need of it. “That’s preposterous,” I had often said to my friends. But now I had to.

When I had proposed to Meena, she had cringed and asked, “What kind of a proposal was that?”

I thought I was being very romantic, but little did I know that I had done it in an utmost unromantic way. But now that I have learnt my lesson, let me tell you. Proposing to a girl is like selling a product. Product should be good of course, but just in case it isn’t, at least the packaging should be made to look attractive with a lot of embellishments. In fact, these days, packaging is all that works. And finally, ‘how’ you sell is more important than ‘what’ the product is. My case was a bit different though. Packaging, product and also the way of selling were not good. Hence the question, ‘What kind of a proposal was that?’

“What else do you expect me to do?” I had asked.

“You come to me like a moron and say that you love me, and you expect me to accept your proposal? Just like that?”

“But I can’t do all those filmy things, Meena. They are yucky!”

“Whatever. At least write me a love letter – on a sheet of paper.”

“What?! Love letter? You expect me to write a love letter? We are living in a digital world, for heavens’ sake.”

“Yeah, but I’m an old fashioned girl, you see,” she had said and walked away, smiling to herself.

I very well knew she was a pragmatic girl, but then again a girl is a girl – a kind of species with X chromosomes. Hence the nakhras! I perfectly knew she was anything, but foolishly romantic. I was just being played by my lady love.

‘Fine. You want me to write a love letter? I will write it. It’s just a piece of cake on a piece of paper,’ I had said to myself and taken up the challenge.

But what I didn’t know then was that, to write a love letter, one needed to use 7% of his brain, whereas Albert Einstein used only 5% during his entire life.


2


Now, sitting at my ‘thinking’ table, I was disoriented. The blank sheet of paper on the table perfectly reflected my state of mind. I hadn’t written a single word in the past one hour. I was frustrated. I got up from the chair, threw away the pen on the cot, and started walking towards the door. I then stopped midway, swiveled round, walked back to my table and sat down again, picking the pen up. I had to write it at any cost.

The world around and inside me was very colourful indeed. But there was one small encumbrance. Those colours were not only bad, but pathetic: pink, red and yellow. Damn!

Pink had occupied the major portion of my world. Why? Don’t really know for sure. Maybe Meena represented pink. Gosh! What’s with girls and pink?! Then, my head was full of crap, and hence yellow. And finally, no matter how hard I tried to get up and go, I couldn’t just do it, for I believe someone had dabbed the bottom portion of my world with red colour, as if telling me, ‘Danger: don’t you dare get up and go’, and then put a Lakshman Rekha over it with a black black-magic pencil. Now that completes the picture. Whoever drew that crappy picture of mine, sitting at my ‘thinking’ table, with a pen in my hand, and head full of crap, deep in thought!


*********


“All right. Let’s do it,” I said to no one in particular, not even to myself. I was a confused soul.

‘Dear Meena,’ I wrote after five full minutes of contemplating.

“Goddamn it!” I cursed myself. ‘Dear Meena’ was too formal. I crumpled the sheet of paper and threw it in the dustbin.

‘Well, yes, maybe “Meena dearest” sounds good,’ I thought and wrote the same on a new sheet of paper.

No way! Rule no. 1: Never try too hard to please a girl. Be natural.

So that sheet of paper too ended up in the dustbin. I thought of being natural and wrote, “Meena, my love.” Was it overly romantic? I didn’t really know.

Without thinking further, I crumpled the paper again and threw it. I was anyhow giving the letter to her, so why mention her name. So I just wrote ‘My love,’ on a fresh paper. I was now convinced.

I finally started writing the body of the letter. “You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen…” I stopped writing and analyzed the sentence. Was she the most beautiful? Naaah…! Kavya was more beautiful than Meena. Love letter should always be honest. So I threw away the paper again.

I wrote, “My love, I’ve always loved you…”

Aaaaarrggghhh. This was not going anywhere. ‘Ok dude, calm down. You can do it. You will do it. Take a deep breath,’ I said to myself and took a new sheet of paper.

I changed the whole format and started.

“Dearest, it’s not that I think you are the most beautiful girl in this world. There are certainly many babes around, but whenever I see you or talk to you or simply be with you or hear your voice or look at those beautiful eyes and many other things I can’t mention, my mind attains its state of tranquility. You are not the girl of my dreams, but the girl of my life, my reality.”

‘Splendid!’ I felicitated myself. But I soon got skeptical. “There are certainly many babes around…?” Oh, what was I thinking?! Nope. This wasn’t working all right. So I again crumpled the paper a la filmy hero and threw it in the wastebasket.


3


Three hours passed and I was still sitting at the table, with pathetic colours around and inside me. The wastebasket was full and brimming with life. Not one letter was worthy enough to make it inside the envelope. Finally, the envelope too ended up in the dustbin.

I knew she too had feelings for me, but then again she was just playing by the rules – rules of chicks. One of the rules says, ‘When a boy proposes to you, never accept it immediately.’ So she couldn’t have helped it. She was bound by the rules.

I was distraught and decided to call if off. I cleaned my table, put the pen back in its holder, and got up from the chair. No more of this love letter business. I can’t do it. It’s not my cup of tea.

And then, I did the unthinkable.


*********


The next day I got a message from Meena. She was coming to my room at six in the evening. I combed my hair, wore cologne, my favourite shirt and jeans, and waited for her with bated breath. I knew she was coming to blast me, but that didn’t matter. I had tried at least.

The previous day, I had mailed her a package. And in it were all the crumpled balls of paper – the proof of my futile attempts to write her a love letter. That was my idea of telling her that I had tried my best. I think probably no boy in this world has ever tried to do as crazy as a thing like this. Now which boy wants his girl to read the trial versions of his love letter?! Well, I was an exception. This would go down in the history of love letter writing, I was sure. An example of what a boy shouldn’t do – should never do.

I was about to be proved wrong.


4


Meena didn’t utter a single word when she came inside my room. In my attempt to impress her with my sophisticated dress code, I had forgotten to clean up my room. Clothes, DVDs and CDs were scattered all over the room, empty beer bottles and cans, newspapers and magazines occupied the chairs and cupboards. My room was at its filthiest best.

I picked up the clothes and made some space for her. When I went to pick up the bottles and cans, she said, “That’s all right.” I was so glad.

We sat at my ‘thinking’ table, diagonally across each other. I said, “Listen…I didn’t mean to… I mean I couldn’t think straight… You know, I’m a very straight guy… Damn! Of course I am straight. I mean these conventional proposal techniques are not my thingies. I am sorry. I know I am not romantic enough to,” –

“Who said you are not romantic?” she said, cutting me off.

“Huh?” I was rather nonplussed.

“You know, if you’d written a flowery love letter, I’d probably have puked,” she said.

“What?! But you asked me to write one.”

“Well, I was curious to know of course. Even if you’d told me directly that you were not going to try it, I’d not have bothered.”

I arched my brows, I crinkled my eyes, I frowned, I smirked, I scratched my head – I was utterly baffled.

She giggled.

“So you read all those I sent you? Please tell me you didn’t,” I finally said, realizing that sending the package was a mistake.

“Yes. I read all the thirty-six attempts,” she said and laughed.

“Oh, damn! What have I done?! I cried.

She looked me in the eye and said, “You know what; when one writes a love letter, his true feelings are manifested on those papers that end up in a wastebasket. The final edition is always sugary, but unfortunately, it isn’t sweet. It’s just a vague attempt to impress the reader. A girl like me can easily look through it. I am fortunate to have known what you really feel about me,” she stopped for a moment and then continued, “And I don’t think you’ll ever be able say those things you desperately tried to say in those letters. I am perfectly ok with it,” she said, ruffling my hair.

I sat there speechless. She smiled.

And what a smile it was! Her full scarlet lips broke into a beautiful curve as a twinkle came into her forget-me-not eyes. It was similar to seeing a red rose blooming on an early dew-filled morning.

While we sat there looking at each other, a jet of cool breeze hit our faces pleasantly. Her lustrous black hair got all tousled and came over her lovely face, disturbing her candid eyes and the red petals of her mouth. Damn! How I hated the breeze then! She gave a small frown and brought her gentle fingers to her face and brushed those curly disheveled strands of hair to the back of her ears.

She gave her winsome smile again and asked me, “So, aren’t you going to say anything?”

I struck a pose by cradling my chin with my thumb and forefinger, and said, “Well, is it necessary?”

“Well, I think not,” she said and gave me a wink.


*********


After a while she asked, tapping her hand on my ‘thinking’ table, “Is this the table, which bore the pain of your love letter writing exercise? Is this the same table you keep talking about?”

I grinned, smoothed my hair and said demurely, “Yeah.”

After all it had proved lucky for me. And now, if anyone had drawn my picture, it would’ve been full of interesting colours, and the picture would’ve looked spectacular, unlike the one in this story.


********************The End********************

Copyright © Karthik 2010


The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.


Comments (126)

One of the best I have read till now... really! You manage to do it every time!!!! How????

Good to read a pleasant story.. and honesty? Sometimes that too changes from moment to moment

this is a very pleasent story to read...:D

i got a love letter once....it was a typical love letter on scented paper....and i think it is just a sign of love.....if you cannot write one it doesnt mean you dont love her....i agree.
but if you have written a good one chances are pretty good that you love them....so in case you dont know how to write a love letter(which i seriously doubt).....learn soon.
and how do i know? the guy who wrote me that letter is still my love :)
and very nice work karthik...
EXCELLENT!!

Its nice when the story ends on a happy note. You've did it once again :-)

"So I again crumpled the paper a la filmy hero and threw it in the wastebasket."

Been seeing lot of movies these days? It was difficult for me to imagine the filmy way :-)

Answering the conundrum of 'What Women Want' :-) . Even the creator himself has failed at that..

But as usual your story does not fail to grip. It is tight and neatly woven in Karthik style. The Meena of your life (real or would-be real at a later date) is lucky. Just hold off on the letter and ask her to read your blog, she will say 'I do' before you can bat an eyelid ; unless you already have :-)

species with X chromosomes. Hence the nakhras!
*ahem ahem..you have the X chromosomes too dude,the difference is the Y , which for some reason is with you guys ( y? y? y?)

Beautiful story.. the protagonist and Meena seem to be a very compatible pair.

Loved the way you fitted in that pic from Blog-a-Ton in this post..artistically done.

hi dude nice one very simple english but it does not look like a real story and must be ur creation. Well its predictable one too but a nice attempt

36 attempts...so cute..

I liked the way u used the pic n made ur story revolve around the theme.. :)

Rules of chicks n One of the rules says, ‘When a boy proposes to you, never accept it immediately.’

I have heard this even earlier and had an argument too abt it being wrong.... :P

Dont wanna argue with u dont worry, just that it may not be true for all.....

was lovely to read the happy ending.......

At last Aal izz well with the letter, clour and ofcourse the girl....... :)

great write up...i was ROFLing on

“Dearest, it’s not that I think you are the most beautiful girl in this world. There are certainly many babes around, but whenever I see you or talk to you or simply be with you or hear your voice or look at those beautiful eyes and many other things I can’t mention, my mind attains its state of tranquility. You are not the girl of my dreams, but the girl of my life, my reality.”

too good...

as usual, loved the narration..flow is good too..

good luck for BAT :)

Now..this is a little personal..but Is the guy in the story Karthik in real life?
hehe...luvd this one Karthik...Very different from the ones u usually write..
Get d gal reading this one soon..!!
Luck!!:)

Hello K! There you go! Yet another beauty! I second Madhu's thoughts about the woman in your life being lucky! I so agree. You buddy, are totally on the contrary to the guy in the story when it comes to writing;) The way you dissect simple situations is astounding..every detail comes out with total clarity!

Pink & girls, yellow & crap,Red & danger..that truly was an ROFL stuff! Chick rules?? hmmmm now that should be discussed in detail :P Let's see what more you know about the rest of the rules ;)

Kudos boy! Wish you luck..Cheerio! :)

Well! Before reading, it looked long but once I started reading, I wanted more. It had so much to do with the picture, unlike few other posts that I read. I mean not your posts but others who have participated in Blog-a-ton 6.
You should try writing a love letter. :) That sending the entire bin (letters in the bin) was very cute, but you gotta think green. I hate when someone wastes papers. :P

there u go..

back to ur very best..

and yeah.. very refreshing one too..
to an extent, it was becoming monotonic to read same kinda ones...
so, this is a welcome change and lo!! what a piece...

I just keep wondering everytime how u r able to take care of every little incidents... those r the ones which make it very interesting and enjoyable..

kudos!

way cute! i made a mess of a ltr i was tryin to write... n my pal told me i should have mailed the messy one out.

i get why ...now :)

Hey nice one.
You so very well elaborated the oicture.
The story was good too..love story for the first time,right?
It was simple and sweet to read.
:~)
I will all he stories(probably) before I vote,but I guess as of now my vote would go for you.

:~) Who doesn't love, love-stories? Though fiction they maybe. ;~)

Keep writing!!

very sweet story..reminds me of 'pyaar impossible' that i saw yesterday..looks matter r don't they??....keep writing.. :))

Well I cant use the word Wow everythime , so this time I am gonna use Superbbbb!!!! :)You have aptly described a guys plight when it comes to pen down his feelings for the gal he loves ...but hey it isnt dat difficult you know :P . N loved the flow of words which kept me hooked to the story till the end :)

hey....nice story sweet and simple...
loved the description of the picture...good one

Very simple and nice story but i feel i could have been a bit short if have to say something.

Ha! Ha! You are a fine storyteller and this one made for an entertaining read :)

Your interpretation of the pic was really commendable.

All the best for BATOM!

Amazingly Beautiful and Sweet!! :)
Had that smile all the while I was reading this!! :)
Damn good one!! :)

debosmita,
Thank you so much. I manage to do it every time? That was again a great compliment. Well, I'm in a flow these days I guess. :-)
Thanks again.

aativas,
Thanks a lot, dude. I'm glad you liked it. And yes, honesty is not constant.

Sid,
Thank you. :-)

Priyanka,
You make a good point. But it's just a story, dudette. I wasn't trying to prove anything here. :)
And me writing a love letter? No way! On the contrary, I believe that writing a love letter is easy, but saying all those things to the person is difficult. Either ways, lovey-dovey things make me cringe. :P
Thank you so much. Glad you enjoyed reading.
By the way, are you the Priyanka of "Tadka!! it sizzles" blog? I couldn't navigate to your blog through this link.

Insignia,
Haha.. glad you liked it. :-)
And no. I am not watching any love stories. You know, crumpling the note and throwing it in the dustbin is too common a scene in idiotic romantic movies. :P
Thanks a bunch!

Madhu,
You just reminded me of Mel Gibson. I really thought it was cool to know what women want, but that movie was an eye-opener. :-)
The story was gripping? Thank you so much. Coming from you, that's a great compliment. :-)
And I haven't yet met Meena of my life. I even googled her, but to no avail. lol.. :D
I hope everything you've said comes true. :-)
Thanks again.

Meenakshi,
We too have X chromosomes?? Hmmmm... Well, maybe we have 'small' x chromosomes. lol.. :P
Thank you so much. I'm glad you liked it. :-)

Himanshu,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined, dude.
Of course it isn't a real story. It's pure fiction. And it was predictable? Funny you should say that, for I never tried to give a twist in the end. :-)
Thanks a million, man. Glad you liked it. :-)

Urvashi,
Thank you so much, Urvashi.
36 attempts is cute? lol... :D That's stupidity. heheheee... :P
And rule is wrong? Naaahhh... I don't think so. It is very much accurate. It's been proved and tested in the lab with the right models. :D
Thanks again. I'm really glad you enjoyed reading. :-)

Neha,
Hehehehe... :D
Though that paragraph can't make its entry into the letter, it's the truth, isn't it? :-)
Glad you enjoyed it. And thanks for the wishes re. :-)

Jaunty,
No no no no no no.....!! It's just a story yar. I don't think I could've done full justice to this tale if I'd used a third person narrative. :-)
But yes, the protagonist is my reflection - to a certain extent. :-)
Glad you liked it, Ridz.
Thank you so much. :-)

Raksha,
Thanks a million, Rock. That felt great.
Well, I think you are right. She might be lucky to have me - if she knows how to bear my pranks. :P
And yeah, I am a sucker for details. I only hope I'm doing a fair job at it.
You want to discuss the rules? Sure we will. I'm game. Let me know when and I'll be ready. :-)
I'm really glad it made you laugh. Again, thank you so much. :-)

Splendid I MUST admit! :) The line of the story according to me was this - "he final edition is always sugary, but unfortunately, it isn’t sweet." That for me is not just the soul of THIS story but probably of a mind thinking out of the box and of wonderful presentation.

There were many things I liked about the story - like the girl did about the thirty-six letters - but nothing more than the simple yet exquisite presentation.

Best wishes. :)

Sundeep,
I was waiting for you comment.
Now I'm glad you liked it. Yes, a change was really necessary.
How am I able to take care of little incidents? Well, little things matter a lot, don't they? Secondly, I think it's all because of the encouragement I'm getting from you and others. :-)
Thank you so much. I'm elated.

Archana,
Thanks a lot, Archana. Yeah, it's the first time. I personally don't like love stories, but this is all I could think of when I saw that picture.
Glad it worked and very glad you liked it. Thanks again. :-)

Pushpee,
Thanks a lot, Pushpee. I'm happy you liked it. Pyaar Impossible?? I don't know about it. And yeah, looks do matter. But then again, it depends on the people. :-)

adreamygal,
Hey that was a nice compliment. Thanks. I'm really glad you liked it. About the picture: well, I tried.
Writing a flowery letter is damn too easy of course. But it's not my kinda thingy. :p

Oxymoron,
Thank you so much. I tried to interpret well. I'm happy you felt it was apt. :-)

Venky,
Thanks a lot, mate.
It was lengthy? Well, I always need a few extra words to make my point, Venky. Can't help it. All my posts are usually lengthy.
Glad you liked it. Thanks again. Keep visiting. :-)

Roshmi,
Thanks a tonne, Roshmi. You made my evening. :-)
Glad to know you felt the interpretation of the pic was apt.
Thanks a lot for the wishes. :-)

Shilpa,
Thank you so much, Shilpa. I'm happy to know it made you smile. :-)

Srinivas,
You won't believe this. I saw your comment on Venky's blog, and was thinking of visiting you and asking you to read my story. Now this is some co-incidence! :-)
Well, I'm extremely glad you liked it. And that sentence you observed, it was really a great compliment. Thank you so much, Srinivas.
And one more thing. If you find any flaws in the language, please do let me know without any hesitations. Either here, in the comment section, or on the mail: karthik.fanatic@gmail.com
It will be very helpful.
Thanks again. Keep visiting. :-)

nicely writ. good luck at BAT

Will do if I find any such. :) This seemed perfect on first read! Cheers. And yeah have blogrolled you, so will visit whenever you update. :)

Very sweet and lovable!

Had to suppress a loud laugh at-
"..it’s not that I think you are the most beautiful girl in this world. There are certainly many babes around,"
and at
".. look at those beautiful eyes and many other things I can’t mention, "


LOL. I like! U write very well :)

Gr8 Post! Loved It!

1. Pink fuzzes up the mind.
2. You wasted way to much paper... Could've e-mailed her and asked her to take a prind-out
3. All other BATers used the concept, you used the prop as well
4. I'm gonna go wastebasket hunting to the homes of all the gals who send me countless letter all the time :-)

Nethra,
You must've now got accustomed to my lengthy posts. That one thing is never gonna change, I guess, except for short fictions like the Bikini fictions.
But I'm glad you didn't feel it. That's a compliment.
I don't think I'll ever write such a letter, for it's too lame. :P
Thanks a lot. Glad you liked it. :-)

Mudra,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined.
Thank you so much.
Well, I can't vouch for it. It kinda depends on the person to whom you are writing. :P But yeah, you should've taken the risk of sending that letter. :-)
Thanks again. Keep visiting.

Just Another Life,
Thank you and thanks for the wishes.

Srinivas,
Oh, that's great then. :-)

gkam,
Thank you so much. I'm glad it made you laugh.
Well, boys are boys, you see. It's encrypted in our DNA code. Can't help it. :P
Thanks again. Keep visiting. :-)

Saurabh,
Thanks a million, dude.
And you are going wastebasket hunting?? Ohhhhh.... :D That's awesome (or is it ossum?) Would like to know when you do that. Don't let me down. All the best!

That was a very sweet story indeed. The guy's love was true, hence the no-drama-36-letter-package! :D
This was very different from the thrillers and cliff hangers you usually write. You are proving your prowess in different genres. Way to go Karthik! :)

One honest guy writing a letter. ROFL. A lesson for many guys out there. Loved it.

What amazes me most is the fact that you have captured this way a girl thinks in a perfect way. Most of the time i have seen guys saying really stupid things like _girls are unbearably follishly romantic_ and all...

at the same time, you have understoo very well that any girl wud be floored to receive that package with pages after pages .. the symbols of your love. the fact that you tried so hard to say what u felt..


i m really really impressed with this one :)

ahem was this a real life account? :P heheh
the flow was right and the last part extremely entertaining. you come up with some really creative stuff Karthik.
err on a 'more serious note' coming from an industry that strives hard (sometimes) to save environment, I was forced to notice that your protagonist has caused enough environmental damage.. nahiiiiiiiiiinnnn :P next time ask him to email or better, he can get himself tattooed :D

I have read and seen lots of romatic stories and movies and yet I have never written a love letter or have tried to write a love story as powerful as you have written.Nice work! Very romantic and colourful:Even with the brain usage and chromosome facts!!

Gr8...awesome story...
I cannot even think of writing such a beautiful story...
Well done!!

but Please don't waste so much of paper....

Absolootellly fantaaaasttik...

Amongst the better-than-better ones I have read till now.... Good Luck for BATOM-6...

Karthik,
This is the best ever post I have read in this very blog. And it is the most beautiful too. Your point-of-view in unambiguous, your tone is good, and the narration is simply outstanding. The story kept me hooked to it until I had finished reading "The End".

The best thing I liked about this story is that it is technically correct. It was easy to slip into the mind of the girl and the point-of-view would have gone haywire. Also, second best thing I liked is the thought-process. You have captured the thoughts very beautifully. Lastly, the third best thing, is the narration. Simply splendid.

A quick suggestion, if I may, is to pay attention to the setting, viz-a-viz, when did he start writing the love letter? When did he post it to her? If he had mailed it to her is it possible for a letter posted today to reach her by tomorrow morning. Basically, the timing is what I am interested in.

A beautiful piece indeed. A thoroughly enjoyable and gripping read.

Cheers mate! You have set new standards in storystelling (at least for me).

Destiny's child,
Thanks a lot. So glad you liked it. I'm trying in different genres. That was a nice compliment. :-)
"This was very different from the thrillers and cliffhangers you usually write." I laughed my guts out when I read this. "Cliffhangers?" You mean the kind of circus I do with my stories? lol.. :D
Thanks again.

The Holy Lama,
Thank you. I'm actually thinking of starting a love letter writing course. :P

Chhaya,
Thanks a million. That was a tremendous compliment.
I might depict my characters like that sometimes, but personally I've never felt that girls are foolishly romantic (some will be of course). Funny thing is, boys are like that nowadays. Whether it's boys or girls, it's yucky! :P
By the way, is it true that girls would be floored when presented with trial letters? I really didn't know that when I was writing the story. I just wrote. Now that you've said, I shall remember this. ;-)
Thanks again, Chhaya.

Shruthi,
Tumba thanks ri. :-)
No. This was not a personal account. Juushhtt a story. I'm still searching for my Meena. (I've started with google for the time being). Let's see what happens. :P
And about the environmental damage; well, I agree. I shall make my characters use e-mails from next time - and then take their printouts.. hehehehe.. :D
I'm really glad it was entertaining for you. Thanks again.

Pra,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined. :-)
Thank you so much. That was a great compliment indeed.
I too have never written a love letter. And even the protagonist of the story doesn't, he just tries. Funny, huh? :-)
I'm really glad you liked it. Keep visiting. :-)

geeta,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined. :-)
Thanks a lot, geeta. I'm happy you liked it.
You can't think of writing a story like this? Come on. I've visited your blog. You write so well. :-)
Thanks again. Keep visiting.

Talking Skull,
Oh, thank you thank you. It means a lot. I'm glad you enjoyed reading. And thanks for the wishes. Keep visiting. :-)

Vittal,
Oh, probably you haven't the vaguest idea how I'm feeling right now, after reading your comment. It really feels great when appreciated - for the right reasons. Thank you so much, Vittal. I was in fact waiting for your comment, eagerly.

You picked up the very three things I paid extra attention to. Hence I'm super elated. You analyze so well, and that's why your comment is so important to me.

Your suggestions mean a lot to me.
Well, it's about a boy who is narrating an incident that happened a long time ago. This is how I imagined while writing and that's why I didn't pay much attention to timing. And about mailing the courier, I imagined them to be college buddies, and the girl, a resident of the college hostel. So it's a matter of one day for the courier to reach her.
I thought these things were trivial to explain in the story. You have observed it, and it only shows how prudent you are as a reader and writer. I shall surely remember these points next time.

By the way, are you certain you didn't find any flaws in the language this time? If you have, I hope you'll bring them to my attention like you did last time. It will be very helpful.

Once again, thank you so much. I feel honoured. :-)

After sooo many people praising this story to the skys my complements will only sound repetitive!
Your ENglish is immaculate too
and I loved your descriptive style..'Forget-me-not Eyes' eh!...
mmmmm..
Now THIS one is a truly romantic story sans the sappiness!..
Cheers..:)

superb!!! another well written story in typical karthik style! there was a permanent smile on my face through out the story!
I quite feel that if you ever happen o be in a similar situation this is exactly how you would react!!!! an awesome read....!!!

Vibhuti,
Thank you so much, Vibhuti. I'm happy you liked it. It's a pleasure to be read by good writers like yourself.
I never wanted to write a love story, let alone a sappy one. :P
This just happened. :-)

Tanmaya,
Hehehe.. Thanks a lot, dear. I knew you'd like it. :-)
This is exactly how I'd react if I were in a similar situation? It's only obvious, isn't it? :P

very well narrated,thanks for writing it down...and you used the pic..gr8

Karthik, it was awesome as ever! The story and the way u narrated it was awesome! God one karthik!

"A love story from a boy!! Huh!! " - that was the first reaction I had half way through your post. But the way you ended was really soothing and beautiful, just like the reflections of the rising sun on the quiet water flowing down the river. A sensous ending did it all. Now probably what has been a women's forte has now been captured by men.
March ahead.

Karthik,

Your stories are very crispy man...I envy that quality of yours ;-)

About the story..

Its such a simple and striking story and the girl Meena is so practical...Huh. Aise ladkiya bhi hoti hai kya? I mean Romantic + Practical *thinking*.

The protagonist is such a moron..he really is not Romantic at all. The way he explained "proposing a girl" as selling a product like a rocket singh the salesman...It was very funny and it made sense who he felt why romance seemed yucky to him..

In the love letter, the way he did the act of addressing her and later when he says that Kavya is more beautiful and all..It was really funny yaar..

The idea of being honest( read "to show i did attempt") was nice...and then Meena replying back to him about the actual feelings in those trash papers and the final outcome as being sugary... This was a good concept :-)


Totally i liked it very much...one of your best Karthik :-)

Keep up the job..

Cheers
Mahesh

Awesome Karthik! This was the best treatment of this topic! I couldn't participate due to lack of time and pssssst: Don't tell anyone, but I had absolutely no clue what to write! ;)
Cheers!

PS: I am glad I didn't participate. Would have had to compete with THIS!

Nikhil,
Thanks a lot, Nikhil. Nice to know you liked it. Keep visiting.

Shruti,
Thank you so much, Shruti. I'm really glad you liked it. Keep visiting.

dattaabhishek,
Thanks a million, Abhishek. Glad you found it beautiful.
And women's forte? Dude, Erich Segal is a man and he writes only love stories. :P
Thanks again. Keep visiting.

Mahesh,
That was a tremendous compliment, Mahesh. Thanks a tonne!
And yes, man. Aise ladkiya bhi hoti hai. A few female friends (not girl friends) I have are all like that. Or probably I choose my friends like that. Those girls are more practical and mature than I am. I'm a fortunate guy. :-)
And dude, being romantic does not mean being sappy.
Thanks again, man. I'm extremely glad you liked it so much.
Cheerios! :-)

Preeti,
Heyy! I was hoping to read your take on this, but I was disappointed when I didn't see your entry. :-(
You couldn't participate due to lack of time, I'm certain. And not because you couldn't come up with something. I don't believe that.

Thank you so much, Preeti. I'm happy to know that you liked it. Moreover, I'm very glad you felt that the interpretation of the picture was apt. :-)

You laughed your guts out? And I thought I gave you a super-duper compliment! Kya yaar...spoiled it all :p

A very good lengthy post! I think this is the third post I am reading who interpreted the guy in the image as the lover writing a love letter! That's a beautiful imagination Karthik! I loved the final part that has a very apt conclusion!

Lovely story.. happy ending!! Beutiful :)

Hey Karthik,
I have no issues with your English man. It is good and better than mine.

The point about time I made, it is very important. It cannot be trivial, "especially" in this story because it leaves certain questions unanswered. I understand the fact that a courier can most definitely reach the 'next' building in one day. But check this out. If the boy had sent it in the evening, it could only reach by afternoon? If it did then the girl would take some time to read and ponder before calling. If so she couldn't have called until evening, just in case we say that she was super-fast in her ponderings. But, the boy already knew in the morning that she was coming at 6 in the evening, that means he must have sent it in the morning a day before. So you see it is a full circle and without mentioning the time your story can have loose ends. Having said all these 'mean' things, I shall not take any credit away from your 'brilliant' idea and theme. Again, beautifully done Karthik. You have indeed set a new precedent.

And, thanks a million for that meticulous counting of syllables on my Haiku. I have no idea how I missed it, but I have corrected it now. You indeed saved me a lot of embarrassment. :-)

Cheers!

Hey that was a splendid story indeed.I loved every moment of it especially the part where you mention the colors.

“There are certainly many babes around…?” Oh, what was I thinking?!
That really did make me laugh out loud. :P
Write more.

P.S:I am back to blogging.I hope you haven't forgotten me. :)

Destiny's child,
Hahaha...:D
Of course that was a super-duper compliment yar. But when you said cliffhanger stories, I presumed you meant 'ulte-pulte latakne waali stories' and not straight forward ones. :P

Neeraj,
Thanks a lot, Neeraj. I'm glad you liked it. :-)

Annyesha,
Thank you so much, Annyesha. I'm happy you liked it. :-)

Vittal,
I understand that now, Vittal. I mulled over it and I agree with you. Will be cautious about such things in the future. Thank you so much. And what you said were not 'mean' things. Come on, now. Don't be so formal. I value your words.

About the syllable counting; Haiku was a new thing to me, and I just wanted to see how accurate it was. I only checked to understand it properly. :-)

Thanks again.
Cheerios! :-)

Samadrita,
Long time no see. Good to know you are back. :-)
Thanks a million. I'm really glad you liked it. And the part about colours; well, thanks to blog-a-ton for giving such a 'beautiful' picture for a topic! :P
Nevertheless, I enjoyed writing this story.

P.S. Are you kidding me? How can I forget such a wonderful writer?

P.P.S. I've written a few stories when you weren't here. Check them out if possible. Would love to know what you think.

Loved the final package idea :)

Lol @ “There are certainly many babes around…?” Oh, what was I thinking?!

'She gave her winsome smile again and asked me, “So, aren’t you going to say anything?”
I struck a pose by cradling my chin with my thumb and forefinger, and said, “Well, is it necessary?”
“Well, I think not,” she said and gave me a wink.' - Too cute!

N err..may I add..a criticism? Scarlet lips, red petals of her mouth ..too cliche.. oft-repeated to describe lady loves..maybe you could have tried your hand at changing that.What say?

Hehe.. Thanks a lot, yar. It's a pleasure to know you liked it. :-)

They are cliched, did you say? Well...um...aaa...hmmmm....yes, you might be right. Will come up with some other terms next time when I need to describe "things". :D
Have any suggestions, by the way? ;-)
Thanks again.

You are adept in story telling with apt narration....
I guess you can become a screen play writer too....
Perfect balance....except few real time issues
Words and scenarios complemented each other very well....
The flow was so soothing that i really got involved ..... almost in to the scenes....
I will consider this for voting :)

katile E nigahien kafi thi hamare katl e aam k liye ...
kambkht woh mukuradiye humien dekh kar..


this linecame in my mind...
nice work.

keep smiling.

congrats for winning the first BAT of 2010 :D

Congratulations Karthik!! for being the first BATOM 2010 winner.

Keep writing such great works! :)

Cheers.

conratulations!!!
You deserved it!! keep up the great work!

Cheers!
Tavish
Blog link:Sensible Bakwas

Mahesh,
Thanks a bunch, Mahesh. I'm really glad you liked it. That was a wonderful compliment indeed. :-)
And thanks for voting me. I'm honoured.

Makk,
Thank you so much. I'm happy you enjoyed reading it. :-)

Neha,
Yo! Thanks a million, Neha. ;-)

gkam,
Thank you. That was encouraging. :-)

Tavish,
Thanks a lot, Tavish. I appreciate it. :-)

A well sequenced post man!
first timer on ur blog... and Loved it..

Congrats!

Congrats Karthik....for winning the first BAT ..2010
Keep it up!!!

Congrats Karthik. I almost voted for you before 'switching sides' with Madhu... :-) ... and missed the chance to brag that I voted the 'winner'.

Nevertheless, you write extremely well. Keep blogging buddy...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! from first runners up last time, to the winner this time :-) keep writing!

(where is my reward for voting for u?)

Azad,
Thank you so much, Azad. I'm glad you liked it.
Keep visiting.

geeta,
Thank you so much, geeta. That was encouraging.

Talking Skull,
Thanks a lot, sir. Well, I too voted for Madhu. So, high five! :-)
Thanks for the appreciation. Will keep blogging for sure. And you please keep visiting. :-)

Debosmita,
Heyy, thanks a million for voting me for the second time in a row. :-)
Well, your reward? How about I write a mind-blowing post sometime soon for you to read and enjoy? :-)

Karthik I have to tell you that of all your posts, I liked this one the best.It is so very well told and sweet.Also loved that part of proposing and selling. Have to admit that many a times its true.
Kudos!

Hey CONGRATULATIONS Karthik..
I just read and saw ur award badge as the first Blog-a-Tonic of the year!!!
I have just joined in toobut have no clue how it works..
Hope ull guide me too..
I really am interested in grooming to be a better writer!
:)
Cheers to ur success once again!

Congrats Dude!
A well deserved win! :)
Do I get a Blog-treat for the vote I gave you? Ahem? :)
Cheers!

grace,
Thank you so much, grace! You think this is my best? Funny, I never thought so many would like this so much. I'd never written a love story. You know, it's simply not my thing. But I'm extremely happy you liked and enjoyed reading it. Guess I've done a fair job then. ;-)
Thanks again! :-)

I used to visit your blog often to see a post.
m\
this is fantastic
congrats!! dude..you deserve it

Vibhuti,
Thanks a lot, Vibhuti! I'm elated.
Yes, I saw your name there. Good to know you've joined too. I will only be happy to guide you.

The concept is simple, yar. It is conducted every month. You have to write a post for the topic given (this time the format was changed. Instead of a phrase, a picture was given as the topic - the one you saw on my post) and have to post your link on Blog-a-ton blog. Two days later, voting begins. The one who gets maximum votes wins. That's all. :-)

If you have any other doubts, ask me. Or visit the blog-a-ton blog and read through or you can also contact Vipul, the founder of Blog-a-ton - the brain behind this idea.

And by the way, you are already the best writer, and you still want to be better? Greedy you! Oh, you mean, become better than the best? Ok, got it. Ha ha.. ;-)

Preeti,
Heyy, thanks a lot, Preeti. And thanks a tonne, for voting me. :-)
Sure you'll get a blog-treat. Tell me what you want. ;-)

Sorcy,
You used to visit often? Hey what's that supposed to mean, dude?
Well, thanks a lot. Glad you liked it.

Undoubtedly you have done a great job. Honestly even I quite detest the stinkingly romantic love stories, a bit too sweet for me to gulp.Love stories should be realistic and honest and thats where you score.

Mushy romantic stories are yucky, aren't they? Good to know you too feel the same way. The only two love stories I've liked are the love story between Howard Roark and Dominique Francon in Ayn Rand's 'The Fountainhead' and Erich Segal's 'Love Story.' The latter is quite typical, but at least it is very honest, practical, and witty. :-)
Thanks!

Well I didn't quite like Segal's Love Story. Not my type at all and am yet to read The Fountainhead(eeks!).

You won the contest for the month? Wow man! That is incredible. Congratulations Karthik. You deserved the recognition and the accolades. That's an amazing feat.

grace,
Hehe.. :D I can understand. :-)
DO read fountainhead, or else you'll be missing something.

Vittal,
Thank you so much, Vittal. Didn't really think I'd win. But now that I've won, it feels great really. :-)

Congratulations :) As I had already said.. it was a great post. Well done!!
PS: U have been awarded on my blog. Please visit and do the honours.

it was bound to come sooner than later..

and it is gr8 moment for u.. cheers!!

am so happy that u got it :)

Wow and Aww and Wow!
I had this goofy smile on my face as I read this and it was oh so sweet a story! Loved it! :)

Annyesha,
Thanks again.
Yes, I'm on it right away. :-)

Sundeep,
Thank you so much, man. Didn't really think so many would like this story, including you. Now I'm only glad about it. Your comments mean a lot to me, Sundeep. Thanks again. :-)

Ashley,
And now I'm having a smile on my face reading your comment. :-)
Thanks a lot, Ashley. I'm so happy you liked it.

nice piece!
the 2nd chapter got a bit drab, too much of details??? anyways, the concept was pretty good and everything got together pretty well by the time of the ending :)

A very nice story Dude.........
Keep penning
:)

Murali,
Long time no see.
Well, thanks a lot, man. I'm glad you liked it. :-)

Vijay,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined.
Thank you so much. Will certainly keep writing. :-)

Gurugale, nammo-namaha!! great post! loved the way you have explained the futile efforts of the boy (or should I say, your efforts).

the "BREEZY" narration is tantalizing too. have to learn a lot from you, gurugale.

Give us more.

hey....how r u/

wrote a little poem do comment...

Sujith,
Haha.. Thank you, kavigale, thank you. You made my day. ;-)
And no; not my efforts. It's just a story. I'm really glad you liked it so much.
Thanks again, maga. Will certainly write more.

Wanderer,
I'm fine. Thank you. Yes, will read your poem soon.

Wowww.Now we know what happens behind the scenes. Allthough your idea of presenting all the scratch papers was unique and lovely. Very well written..You deserve it..:)

Thank you so much. I'm very glad you liked it. :-)

Hey, Karthik.. Finally um here after procrastinating for too long..
gr8 post man and thanx for appreciating my image so much :p
its gr8 to hav u on board nd keep enriching the event like this :)

Vipul,
Glad you read it, Vipul. And very glad you liked it.
Hahaha.. :D That pic was damn beautiful and I had to pay my respects in a good way. :P :P
Thanks to you, for coming up with such mind-boggling concept. You've made me write like never before. Please keep visiting. :-)

Deepika,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined.
Thank you so much, Deepika. I'm happy you enjoyed reading.
And I don't really know whether writing love letter is tough or not, for I've not written one - yet. :)

Once again, I'm really sorry for not getting your comment published. Blogger sucks sometimes. :(

Hey Karthik,
This is the first time I have read your blog, and I must say, I am thoroughly impressed. There is a certain frankness in your writing, which i feel is matched only by the sense of humour you have. All in all, a great read.

Karthik,

That was so amazing! Well, what can I say? That was certainly not a love story..and yet it was labelled love all over it.

It was such an innovative thing to do-to send a package of all the attempted love letters. I totally loved that part. I have no clue whether the story is real or it is just fiction, but I completely enjoyed it and felt happy for the protagonist and Meena as well.

I totally agree with you. Love stories suck..and pink color is puck-ish. LOL. I try to write different things..but I was recently challenged to write something that can make people smile. So, in that attempt, I've written a story which I am sure is not the genre you'd prefer reading. But I'd love hear your inputs. So check it out in your leisure time.

All I know is that you are not just another blogger. You're way too good in this and you stand tall as an inspiration to write good short stories which I love to do. Thank You for writing such an enjoyable story.

Cheers.

girls become modern or old fashioned as and when it suits them.

Rahul,
Welcome to Eloquence Redefined, Rahul.
Thank you so much, man. I'm so glad you liked it. You made my day for sure. :)

Vikram,
Heyy thank you so much, man.
You got it right. It's not a conventional story concerning a boy and a girl. These conventional 'kuch kuch hota hai' kinda stories get on my nerves. I've never liked any of them. Too lame. Hence I wanted to try something new. I'm so very happy you liked it and struck a chord with you.

And it is fiction, man. Not my story. :)

I shall certainly read your story, Vikram. You needn't even say that. And don't worry about me not liking the genre. It's all about narrating, you know, how you tell the story, and it would be a cliche if I said that you are a great narrator.

Once again, with all of my heart, thank you very much for appreciating my work. You have only encouraged me to write more.
Cheerios!

Antarman,
You might be right after all.

I think the first two times I came to this post I backed back out - it was just to long for me. But today it is Sunday and time is a pleasure. Once I started the piece it kept me engaged. At the end - I said to myself, Grayquill you just read a love story...what's wrong with you? and worse yet you liked it.
Karthik - what are doing to me?
Great writing!

Grayquill,
I'm so glad you read. :)
Sure my posts are lengthy, but next time don't scroll down to see its length. Just start reading and I guarantee you, you wont be bored. I'm quite confident I can keep the reader engaged.
And you too don't like love stories? Whoa! Me neither. High five on that. But this is not a conventional love story, is it? I've tried something out of the box. I'm happy you liked it.
Thank you so much, sir. :)

A hundred and twenty-two comments??!!!! :-o
Whew!! You sure don't need the ten ways to get famous!! :p

Hahaha.. :D Half of the comments are mine here. :P :P

Karthik,
I must say that your posts are really both a learning experience and an enjoyable read.. i also try nd blog at rahul-mohandas.blogspot.com
please help with pointers for improvement (This is not a sales pitch)..

Thanks again, Rahul.
And sorry, I couldn't visit your space soon. Don't mind. I am right on my way to your blog.

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