Verbal Copulation!


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I never fucking use profanity; not even in my fucking stories, let alone in my fucking everyday life. But I am certain that there are some noble souls out there who take pride in using it and they use it extensively. That splendid word ‘Fuck’ appears in every fucking sentence they speak. They may not know how to use the words ‘joie de vivre’ or ‘bon vivant,’ but they definitely know how to use the word ‘Fuck’ in every aspect of their dialects. There was a time when the word ‘Shit’ was very popular, but now that word has been replaced by ‘Fuck.’ I wonder which word will replace this in the future (my imagination is already running wild). Well, there was also a time when we used to raise our fucking eyebrows upon hearing this word used by someone, but now we raise our eyebrows if one doesn’t use it. Ah, such a fucking irony!

A few days ago I was going through my eclectic collection of mp3s and I stumbled upon a small audio file titled ‘Osho.’ Some wonderful soul had e-mailed this file a long time ago, but unfortunately I neither had the patience, nor the time to listen to some rambling talks of some philosophical guru. After much debating with myself, I finally scrounged up some courage and decided to listen to it anyway. And when I did, I was fucking surprised. I wondered why I didn’t listen to it all these days. It was surely an eye opener. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh aka Osho (1931-1990) seems to have done an extensive research on the word ‘Fuck.’ The audio clip was just over 5 minutes and here I am posting the exact words said by Osho. Over to Osho:

It is one of the most beautiful words. English language should be proud of it. I don’t think any other language has any such beautiful word. One of the most interesting words in English language today is the word ‘Fuck.’ It is one magical word, just by its sound; it can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. In language, it falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive and intransitive.

Transitive: John fucked Mary.

Intransitive: Mary was fucked by John.

As a noun: Mary is a fine fuck.

As an adjective: Mary is fucking beautiful.

As you can see there are not many words with the versatility of ‘Fuck.’ Besides the actual meaning, there are also the following uses.

Fraud: I got fucked at the used car lots.

Ignorance: Fucked, if I know.

Trouble: I guess I am fucked now.

Aggression: Fuck you!

Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here?

Difficulty: I can’t understand this fucking job.

Incompetence: He is a fuck off.

Suspicion: What the fuck are you doing?

Enjoyment: I had a fucking time.

Request: Get the fuck out of here.

Hostility: I am going to knock your fucking head off.

Greeting: How the fuck are you?

Apathy: Who gives a fuck!

Innovation: Get a bigger fucking hammer.

Surprise: Fuck! You scared the shit out of me.

Anxiety: Today is really fucked.

This was it! He then goes on to say that repeating the mantra “Fuck you!” 5 times soon after getting up in the morning clears your throat. How fucking cool is that! This audio clip and my own personal experiences with so many fucking uncultured and uncivilized people who use this beautiful word all the time really inspired me to find out more about it. So, I started digging, and eventually I found out some fucking etymological facts which I am posting here. I found 3 stories related to ‘Fuck’s’ discovery. But which one is true? You shall have to figure it out for yourselves.

1. In ancient England a person could not have sex unless he had the consent of the King (or unless he was in the Royal Family). When people wanted to have a baby, they first had to get the consent of the King; the King then gave them a placard that they hung on their door while having sex. The placard had F.U.C.K. (Fornication Under the Consent of the King) written on it.

2. F.U.C.K. originated in the 1800s in London, when someone would be punished for prostitution. It was an acronym for the words, “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.” These words were written on the cells that held these criminals. Some time later the officers got sick and tired of writing these words, so they abbreviated to F.U.C.K. Later on they just started writing FUCK (without full stops).

Now, the third story is pretty interesting. Besides the etymological theory, it also explains the origin of the usage of middle finger. Read on.

3. Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger, it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow; and therefore, they would be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous English longbow was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as 'plucking the yew' (or 'pluck yew'). Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, “See, we can still pluck yew!” Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodental’s fricative F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one finger salute. It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as ‘giving the bird.’ As the centuries passed by ‘yew’ became ‘you’ since both are pronounced in the same way. So, fuck you!

These are the three stories behind the discovery of ‘FUCK.’ So, what do you think? Did your knowledge base expand? Good for you! Congratu-fucking-lations! Now you know that ‘FUCK’ is not just a word, but it is a fascinating subject to be studied and researched. Some amazing people like Bruce Willis, Quentin Tarantino, Guy Ritchie, Tupac Shakur, Eminem, 50 Cent and many more have contributed a lot to this subject and we, their fucking disciples, should follow their foot steps and never fucking let them down.

Maybe someday in the future, children at school shall learn Eminem’s lyrics instead of William Butler Yeats’s poems. Maybe someday, teachers might say to their students, “Why the fuck haven’t you done your homework?” to which the students might answer, “Because, I was fucking out of station.”

Dear folks, it’s time that we start introspecting. Do we really want to set these kinds of examples to our younger generation? Do we really want some 10 yr old kid to say to us, “Fuck you, oldie! Can’t you just mind your own fucking business?”

Well, I didn’t think so. So, come on, all of you. Let’s swear on Oxford, Merriam-Webster and Collins that we shall never fucking use profanity.


(Hope you liked this fucking article).

Copyright © Karthik 2009

Some amazing facts about Formula One!


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Michael Schumacher is not making a come back. When I heard the news I really didn’t know whether to be happy or sad about it. In spite of being a great fan of Schumi, I really didn’t want him to come back, because of the reasons I’ve mentioned in one of my posts (refer ‘Schumi is back?!’). The latest news is that test driver Luca Badoer is taking the wheel for Ferrari. I just hope Ferrari lives up to its name.


Recently, when I was talking about Formula One with one of my friends, he ridiculed by saying that anybody could drive a car and it definitely is not a great sport like Cricket, Soccer or Tennis. So for those of you who think that driving a Formula One car is easy, I’m posting some facts about this great sport. Mind you, it is the most dangerous and risky sport that ever is and it requires tremendous skill and will power to drive it.

o F1 car is made up of 80,000 components, if it were assembled 99.9% correctly; it would still start the race with 80 things wrong!

o When a F1 driver hits the brakes on his car he experiences retardation or deceleration comparable to a regular car driving through a BRICK wall at 300kmph!

o F1 car can go from 0 to 160 kph AND back to 0 in FOUR seconds!

o F1 car engines last only for about 2 hours of racing mostly before blowing up on the other hand we expect our engines to last us for a decent 20yrs on an average and they quite faithfully DO....that’s the extent to which the engines are pushed to perform.

o An average F1 driver looses about 4kgs of weight after just one race due to the prolonged exposure to high g-forces and temperatures for little over an hour and a half. He experiences up to 5 G (Yeah that’s right!!).

o The temperature inside the cockpit of Formula One car can reach well over 50 degree C. Now imagine yourself sitting inside a pressure cooker for over an hour and a half.

o At 550kg a F1 car is less than half the weight of a Mini.

o To give you an idea of just how important aerodynamic design and added down force can be, small planes can take off at slower speeds than F1 cars travel on the track.

o Without aerodynamic down force, high-performance racing cars have sufficient power to produce wheel spin and loss of control at 160 kph. They usually race at over 300 kph.

o In a street course race like the Monaco grand prix, the down force provides enough suction to lift manhole covers. Before the race all of the manhole covers on the streets have to be welded down to prevent this from happening!

o The cars can be refueled at 12 liters per second. The rig used would take just 4 seconds to fill the tank of an average 50 litre family cars. They use the same refueling rigs used on US military helicopters today.

o During the race the tyres lose weight! Each tyre loses about 0.5 kg in weight due to wear.

o Normal tyres last 60 000 - 100 000 km. Racing tyres are designed to last 90 - 120 km.

o A dry-weather F1 tyre reaches peak operating performance (best 20grip) when tread temperature is between 900C and 1200C. (Water boils at 100C remember) At top speed, F1 tyres rotate 50 times a second.

o A Formula One driver’s heart beats 170 times per minute while driving. (Race goes on for an hour and a half)


This is the punishment a F1 driver goes through. It is not just about driving skills, but also it requires lots of guts and a very high level of concentration. Every second counts. Apart from these, danger always lurks on the tracks. One of the best racers of all times, Ayrton Senna died on the track in the early 90s. Now, after reading this, if you still think that Formula One is an easy and mindless sport, you better think again!

Iron Lady vs. Plastic Man


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27 years had passed since the end of World War II, but the horror and holocaust that had been carried out by Nazi Germany were still fresh in people’s minds. Many Israelis had lost their friends and relatives in that holocaust and the Munich Olympics was a way of making a statement by showing their resilience.

The year was 1972. The date was September 4th. None of the 11 Israeli athletes and their coaches was aware of his fate. When they were enjoying their time in the Olympic Village, 8 terrorists belonging to Black September sneaked into the village in order to take them hostage. 2 of the 11 athletes were killed instantly when they tried to fight them. The remaining 9 athletes were taken hostage. Though 5 of the terrorists were killed in the action by the guards, the remaining 3 succeeded in stating their demands to the Israeli Government. The attackers demanded the release and safe passage to Egypt of 234 Palestinians and non-Arabs jailed in Israel, along with two German radicals who were founders of the German Red Army Faction. When they didn’t get the expected reaction from the Israeli Government, they threw the body of Moshe Weinberg (wrestling coach) out the front door of the apartment to prove how serious they were.

None of their demands were met and the remaining 3 terrorists were captured, but only after they had killed all the remaining 9 athletes. The entire Olympic team of Israel was wiped out. (The captured terrorists were later released by the West Germany when Black September hijacked one of their airliners, Lufthansa. That release later led to the speculation that West Germany helped Black September stage the hijacking)

The entire nation was distressed and demanded justice. When Israel didn’t get much help from its friendly nations, Golda Meir, the then Prime Minister of Israel took the matter into her own hands and formed a committee X along with the Defense Minister Moshe Dayan. The operation was called, “Operation Wrath of God.”

The committee drew up a list of names that were directly or indirectly responsible for Munich Massacre. The list included 20-35 names including Black September and PLO (Palestine Liberation Organization) members. Mission was simple: find them and KILL THEM.

The director of MOSSAD, Zvi Zamir, formed several groups for the operation. Each group for a different purpose and each group was oblivious of the other groups. Among these, a group of 4 headed by Yural Aviv played an important role in the operation. They were given a list of 11 names including Ali Hassan Salameh, the master mind behind the Munich Massacre. It was an ‘eye for an eye.’ 11 assassinations for 11 murdered athletes.

The first kill occurred on October 16, 1972, when Palestinian Abdel Waer Zwaiter was shot 11 times in his apartment. Over the next few years MOSSAD hunted and killed the people responsible for the gruesome act. The group led by Yural Aviv killed 9 out of 11 people (excluding Ali Hassan Salameh, but he was later killed in 1979) in the list. The group operated outside of direct government control, and that its only communication was with Michael Harari, MOSSAD agent who led the creation and direction of the groups. Had they been caught during the operation, they would’ve been on their own (some of the members belonging to other groups were caught by the local police and later released).

Israel didn’t rest until it had its vengeance. Though ‘Operation Wrath of God’ was suspended by Golda Meir due to the international outrage over the mistaken murder of an innocent waiter in Morocco, the operation still continued under cover well into the 1980s. Israel continued taking revenge on the PLO and Black September. None of them were spared. It was a retaliation that brought tremendous fear in Palestinians, especially Black September.

Now can you imagine the sheer grit and boldness of such a decision taken by an almost eighty year old Golda Meir? ‘Should anyone attack my people, he won’t be spared,’ was the statement made, not through words, but through actions. Every one of the culprits was hunted like a stray dog and killed. No wonder she is called ‘The Iron Lady.’ It was not long before the rest of the world, especially Palestine, realized that Israel could strike anyone anywhere anytime if it is disturbed in anyway.

In a recent interview, former MOSSAD chief Zvi Zamir said that it was not about revenge, but only to prevent the attacks in the future. Whatever it is, the thing to be noticed is to what extent Israel can go to bring justice upon the people who try to destroy the peace of Israelis. ‘An Eye for an Eye.’

Israel continues to prove its power of resilience. It has always taken care of itself, and has never depended on any other nation. Its recent attack on Gaza is one such example. It has always retaliated in an apt way whenever it has been attacked.


Now, the following is a list of major terrorist attacks in India that took place in the past 5 years (2003 – 2008):

  • August 25, 2003 (Mumbai): 46 people killed in two blasts including one near the Gateway of India.
  • October 29, 2005 (New Delhi): 62 people killed in three serial blasts at Sarojini Nagar on the eve of Diwali.
  • March 7, 2006 (Varanasi): 21 people killed in three blasts at Sankat Mochan temple and Railway Station.
  • July 11, 2006 (Mumbai): 209 people killed in seven blasts on Suburban trains and stations in Mumbai.
  • September 8, 2006 (Malegaon, Maharashtra): 40 people killed in two blasts in Malegaon.
  • February 19, 2007 (Diwana, Panipat): 68 people killed after two bombs went off on the Samjhauta Express at Diwana near Panipat (Haryana).
  • May 18, 2007 (Hyderabad): 12 people killed in historic Mecca Mosque in the Charminar area.
  • Aug 25, 2007 (Hyderabad): 42 people killed in two blasts at Gokul Chat and Lumbini Park.
  • May 13, 2008 (Jaipur): 80 people killed in serial bomb blasts in Jaipur.
  • July 25, 2008 (Bangalore): One person killed in a low-intensity bomb explosion.
  • July 26, 2008 (Ahmedabad): 57 people killed after 18-odd synchronised bombs went off within less than two hours.
  • September 13, 2008 (New Delhi): 26 people killed in six serial bomb blasts at Karol Bagh, GK-II and Connaught Place.
  • September 27, 2008 (New Delhi): Three people killed after a crude bomb exploded in Mehrauli.
  • September 29 2008 (Modasa, Gujarat): One killed and several injured after a low-intensity bomb went off near a mosque.
  • September 29, 2008 (Malegaon, Maharashtra): Five people died after a bomb went off in a crowded market.
  • October 01, 2008 (Agartala, Tripura): Two people killed and 100 injured in serial bomb blasts in crowded market places in Agartala.
  • Oct 14, 2008 (Kanpur): Eight people injured after bomb planted on a rented bicycle went off in the Colonelganj market.
  • Oct 21, 2008 (Imphal, Manipur): 17 killed in a powerful blast near Manipur Police Commando complex.
  • Oct 30, 2008 (Assam): At least 50 killed in serial bomb blasts across Assam.
  • Nov 26, 2008 (Mumbai): 183 killed and over 300 injured in a daring terror attack at Hotel Taj, Nariman House, Hotel Trident Oberoi and other places in the city. It was the worst-ever terror attack in India, which lasted for 59 hours. Nine terrorists were gunned down, while one was caught alive. 20 policemen and 2 NSG Commandos were killed, while 23 foreign nationals were among the dead.

You know what I am trying to say, don’t you? (Mind you; this is just a list of attacks perpetrated by the terrorists in the last FIVE years and I haven’t mentioned ’93 bomb blasts in Mumbai)

Has justice been brought upon the people who were responsible for these macabre crimes? Can anyone tell me how many terrorists and people related to these ghastly crimes have been caught till now? Well, I don’t expect anyone to answer these questions; for they are rhetorical. Ajmal Kasab’s trial is still going on when the holocaust happened almost 9 months ago. The only news we hear about him or the trial is that he is demanding books and toothpaste and what not.

And another Pakistani terrorist Afzal Guru, who has been sentenced to death by the court of law is still enjoying Indian hospitality. They say that he will be executed only after all the other clemency petitions filed before him are decided. How stupid is that? Do they need that much of time to take action against a TERRORIST? Is it so difficult to kill a filthy rat that sneaks into our house and eats away all our groceries?

Every time there is an attack, the politicians yelp and whine on TVs. Forget about the necessary measures to be taken, they even stop whining about it very soon. 26/11 is not an exception either. So many awkward statements were made for the next one month, but no actions were taken. Everything stopped suddenly; the news about the attacks, the statements by the politicians. Why? Because of the elections that was on its way. And so far nothing!

Dr. Manmohan Singh refused to take part in a live public debate and he almost took two weeks to say ‘No.’ Upon asking why, he said that he didn’t want to grant ‘alternate’ PM’s stature to L. K. Advani. This is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard a reputable politician say. Who is he to ‘grant’ anything? Isn’t this a democratic country? If he can’t even take part in a simple debate in front of Indian public, how can we even expect him to lead the country?

Another nonsensical thing was that when he called Gujarat an undeveloped state. Height of ignorance!

These are just a few examples.

I was reading an old article on Golda Meir the other day and I couldn’t just stop thinking about the above said things.

Can our Prime Minister take such a bold step similar to the one taken by ‘The Iron Lady’? If not, then what should we call him? ‘The Plastic Man’?


P.S. I am not inclined to any political party. Whatever I have said is nothing but reality.

Copyright © Karthik 2009

Schumi is back?!


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I was a bit disappointed last Saturday when I saw Felipe Massa of Ferrari suffer an accident during the qualifying race of Hungarian Grand Prix. He is in fact one of my favourite drivers and I really felt very sad when I saw him drive through the gravel area at around 120mph along the circuit before slamming into the tire barrier. I was hoping he would make the podium finish on the race day (for the first time in this season) since he was performing very well in the qualifying race.

It was a nasty accident, which was akin to Heikki Kovalainen’s high speed crash at last year’s Spanish GP.

I felt good when they said that he was stabilized. But then again I was heart broken when I saw the news that said he wouldn’t be racing for the remainder of the season. How unfortunate!

So the question immediately popped up: Who will replace Massa?

It was not long before I realized that seven-time world champion Michael Schumacher was asked to take the wheel. I was happy; for I thought it would be a treat to watch him race after 3 long years. But still a small doubt remained in my head. Is it a good decision to come back after the retirement? After 3 years?

No doubt he is the King of Racing, no doubt he is racing since he was four-years old, no doubt racing is in his blood, but is he fit physically to undergo such an enormous pressure?

His retirement came at the right time when Fernando Alonso, his 12-years junior, started giving him a hard time on the race tracks just what Schumi had done to Ayrton Senna in the early nineties. His departure 3 years ago was timely and graceful.

Now, 3 years later, a lot of things have been changed; especially the change in the car design. When it comes to Ferrari, it is running with KERS technology – something the current drivers are still floundering to deal with. And not to mention the fact that Schumacher is unfamiliar with Valencia street circuit – Telefonica Grand Prix of Europe (where the next race takes place, 21st August, 2009).

Schumacher’s racing brain will be as sharp as ever, but will his fitness be? He is 40 years old and off the track for the past three years. Will he be able to cope up with the violence of up to 4g experienced when the car comes down to 190 mph to 70 mph in 2 seconds?

He even took to motorbike racing after the retirement, but only to suffer frequent fall offs. Now that he has returned, doesn’t havoc play with his pride if, and I mean if, he loses?

He has definitely missed that adrenaline rush for 3 years, so he must be pretty happy to have it all back. Whatever happens, it will certainly be great for the motor sport racing, for Formula One, and to fans like us!

We all love you Schumi! But will you reign supreme again? Only time will tell.

Copyright © Karthik 2009

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The Negotiator
Malgudi Days
As The Crow Flies
Swami and Friends
The Devil's Alternative
The Picture of Dorian Gray
The Godfather
The Seven Minutes
The Prize
Atlas Shrugged
The Fountainhead
If Tomorrow Comes
Digital Fortress
The Chancellor Manuscript
The Bourne Supremacy
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The Fist of God
The Fourth Protocol
The Odessa File
The Day of the Jackal

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